I would like to ask regarding the committing of zina, I've recently been told regarding zina and I would like to gain clarity on what I have heard from one of my educators. So he was telling us regarding zina (adultery) he then proceeded in saying:
"doing all these things makes you impure for 40 days, and so for that 40 days your salaah and nothing you do is accepted because you're impure, so what happens if your mother dies, and you need to make ghusl for her, and you give her ghusl, then her body becomes impure, you then put her kafn and then that becomes impure, and everything is impure, the angels then come to question her in disgust because of your actions and what if you die, you impure, even if they give you 100 ghusls you won't become clean, and you'll enter your grave impure, and nothing you do is accepted for 40 days, also even when you eat, there's nothing in that food, you just gain energy from the noor you have, and before you've even reached purity you again, doing this act of haraam! Because you honestly don't wait for 2 months to see your partner, and so you become hard, and lustful, you start going in all directions of zina, and the Beloved Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam always made dua that oh Allah, please do not let my body be amongst that which will testify against me, and then he went on to say, but tell me, how will you both answer to your parents, as to what they've done to be punished like this, because you have been committing these acts from a very young age and no matter how old you are, there's I'm not sure did he say ayat or an ahadeeth that relates and each of you are like a shepard and will be questioned regarding his flock, and because they didn't tell us all this, they will be punished..."
1. I would like to gain clarity on what he has said.
2. If one marries ones so called boyfriend or girlfriend, is all their previous acts of kissing and touching still regarded as punishable?
3. Also I have been in a relationship with a young lad for over a year, for the first half of our relation, we did not have much contact and did not meet as he was completing his matric there after we began meeting, after hearing the words of my teacher, my partner and I have decided to make a concerted effort to abstain from meeting frequently and committing acts such as kissing one another and touching of the private parts. However we have not committed the act of zina in itself.
4. What is the rule regarding these acts?
I would appreciate a speedy response, as I have been severely disturbed by the lecture from our teacher, I also ask mufti to make dua that Allah keeps my partner and I on the straight path In-sha-allah as we are trying to correct our acts of ignorance.
A: Dear Sister:
Assalaamu alaykum. Your query refers. Here is your answer:
What your educator has mentioned regarding being unclean for 40 days after committing zina and your ibaadat not being accepted, etc. is not true and is not supported by any authentic narration. Neither does this appear in any hadith, nor in the books of fiqah. With due respect to your educator but he has mentioned things that are totally fabricated. It is quite possible that he mentioned these things out of disgust for the sin of zina and to probably instil fear in the heart towards this sin. But no amount of reasoning can justify fabrication of Islamic teaching. Then he has gone to an extreme by adding all the other points that are also unsubstantiated like the ghusl to the dead being incomplete or the food one eats being impure etc.
The reality is that zina, being a distardly and disgusting sin, can be forgiven through sincere taubah and repentance, like so many other major sins. Taubah consists of the following:
a) To be remorseful and to regret the sin;
b) To feel ashamed
c) To beg Allah for forgiveness
d) To promise Allah never to repeat it again
e) To stop the sin and not go back to it at all. This is a sign that one has made sincere taubah.
Marrying one’s girl-friend or boy-friend does not mean the sin is forgiven. That is not taubah. All the marriage does is to make halaal what was previously haraam. For the sin to be forgiven both parties to the zina MUST make sincere taubah and cry before Allah for forgiveness. They must beg Allah daily for forgiveness. This taubah should continue for as long as the sin was committed.
Once taubah is made and the couple have stopped committing that sin, that is a sign that the taubah has been accepted by Allah. Now there is no fear of punishment. Punishment can occur if one died WITHOUT performing taubah. After taubah, there is full hope for Mercy from Allah. We should always have hope in Allah’s Mercy, while at the same time not become complacent or over-confident. Do not think that after Taubah the urge for that sin will not re—surface. the Danger of a relapse is always imminent. We need to be vigilant and careful. The couple may have performed nikah, but what’s to stop either one from falling into another haraam relationship with someone else? So after taubah there must be vigilance and caution, as well as dua to Allah for protection from sin.
The acts of kissing and touching each other’s private parts are also major sins and are regarded as a lesser form of zinaa. Even from these acts we need to make sincere taubah. But as stated earleir once we repent and seek Allah’s forgiveness, we need to he hopeful of His Forgiveness and Mercy.
In short, no matter what major sin one committed, forgiveness can be earned from Allah by turning to Him in taubah and repentance. But this must be done daily. It’s not a one off thing. The sinner should make a 2 rakaats salaatut-taubah daily, after which he or she will cry and beg Allah for forgiveness. Crying or at least making the face like a crying person is important.
Even after committing zina, if one made salaah in a pure state, the salaah will be valid. Likewise any other act of worship one does will be accepted by Allah if done correctly. As for the sin of zinaa, that is a separate issue. If the individual’s good acts are strong, Allah might forgive the sin of zina even without taubah; and if the invidual is weak in good deeds, he or she will need to make a concerted effort of taubah
I trust the above answers all your queries. Feel free to write back if you need more advice.
Mufti Siraj Desai