Divorce

Kinayah Words of Divorce

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Q: I have recently learned that certain phrases uttered constitute talaaq (divorce) in Islam. I want to clarify one such utterance i made during the early years of my marriage. I once had an argument with my wife over her wanting to visit her uncle. I did not want her to go and I said something like "well if you go then don't come back." I am not sure if these are the exact words I used as this was over 10 years ago. After this I left the house and I do not know if my wife went or not. Does this statement constitute divorce in Islam?

A:
Such words are called 'Kinaayah' and will only constitute Talaaq if there was an intention of Talaaq when saying those words.

You had no intention of Talaaq when saying the words, so divorce did not take place.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Divorce in Pregnancy

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Q: Through out the years of our marriage, my husband and I have had numerous arguments and there also has been physical abuse. I tried so hard to have patience. Now I am pregnant and we've had another massive argument and he also hit me a couple of times. I've had enough and I want a divorce.

What is the ruling for a pregnant woman wanting  a divorce?

A:
Divorce issued while the wife is pregnant is valid and binding. If the divorce is issued while she is pregnant then her Iddat period will terminate when she gives birth. So she will remain in Iddat till birth.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Verbal Divorce

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Q: During a fight with my wife, I told her I am giving you Talaaq (divorce) and after that I said twice Talaaq and Talaaq. After that we were together and I said to my wife that it's not confirmed and we are living now together as we were before. Is Talaaq confirmed?

A:
Two Talaaqs have taken place.

You can still keep her in your Nikah (marriage) but remember that you only have one Talaaq left now. If you ever issue Talaaq after this then this marriage will be completely over.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Marriage Breakdown and Wife Divorcing

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Q: I am asking this question on behalf of my friend.

My friend mentioned to me that another friend approached him to see if he would be interested in marrying his sister who is unhappily married and would like to come out of that marriage. My question is would it be permissible for a woman to divorce a man if she find no love, happiness, comfort in that relationship? And given that the underlying issue are essentially that of compatibility.

Specifics to this case as follows:
1. She has been married for some years and has teenage children. She is pious and hijabi.
2. She has made efforts in these past years and sought ways to bring love and has made every attempt to bridge gap to make the relationship work.
3. Her husband, according to her, is good person but lives in his own world and steeped in his ways.
4. The mental compatibility gap is as such due to different personalities but further widened by cultural difference, upbringing though both are Muslims.
5. The relationship in the past years has been cold and the couple have drifted further apart.

A:
A woman cannot divorce a man. A man has to issue the divorce.

She should be advised to make sabr (have patience) and remain in this marriage, especially for the sake of the children.

If compatibility and understanding breaks down completely, then the husband can issue a divorce, especially if there is fear of them not fulfilling each others rights.

No arrangements must be made for her next marriage until she gets divorced and passes through her Iddat. Only after the Iddat should this arrangement be made.

They should consider going for Islamic counseling. Every effort should be made to keep the marriage intact. If everything fails, then only should divorce be considered.

Allah Ta'aala knows best.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Asking about Divorce

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Q: Few months back I was asking questions to my wife about divorce; I mean we had a discussion on divorce and in a question I said: "if I say to you that I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce, then by saying like this does divorce take place in Islam", she replied: "yes". I said: "ok". Then she said to me: "why did you use the divorce word three times?" I said: "I was just asking you a question not giving divorce in any way." Is this a divorce or not? I was not angry at all and we are very happy with each other.

A:
This was not a divorce.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Divorce under Pressure

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Q: Some one issues a divorce to his wife due to pressure from family, but the person doesn't want to give it; the wife is pregnant also and she doesn't know about the divorce. But after that the man wants to make rujoo (take her back in marriage). What is the ruling?

A:
The divorce issued is valid. If a Talaaq Raj'ee was issued then he can make Rujoo during the Iddat period. Her Iddat will end when she gives birth. So he will have to make Rujoo any time before she gives birth.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

Divorce as Last Resort

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Q: Is it a sin to talaq (divorce) my wife if she only listens to her parents always and not me, after staying 5 months with them?

A:
The Hadeeth mentions that divorce is the worst of permissible acts. (Kanzul Ummaal V9 P661). Shari'ah even frowns upon a person who divorces for flimsy reasons, so imagine if a person divorces his wife for no reason. This will definitely be sinful and such a person will have to answer in the Divine court. The throne of Allah shudders when a person divorces his wife (Kanzul Ummaal). A person who divorces with no reason is inviting the wrath of Allah Ta'aala. Shaytaan becomes very happy when a man divorces his wife. (Kanzul Ummaal). Divorcing without reason will be even more pleasing to him.

Talaaq is the last resort. Other means of solving the differences should be adopted and there a few means available. If after trying everything and it fails then only should Talaaq be considered.

Moulana Yusuf Laher

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