Husband's Second Wife

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Q: My husband married another woman without my knowledge. It is now two years since I found out. What can I do to accept this situation and make it a bit easier on me and my sons?

A:
Tell yourself that in the Qur'aan Allah Ta'aala has in His infinite knowledge and wisdom, granted the male permission of keeping more than one wife.The word Islam means 'total submission' to the laws of Allah. The complete Shari'ah must be wholeheartedly and unequivocally accepted to qualify as a true Muslim. An integral part of the Shari'ah is the permissibility of a man taking more than one wife. By marrying the other lady and thereby making her Halaal for himself, he has saved himself from sin, and this is commendable. Resign yourself to the fact that the other lady was written in his Taqdeer and no one could have prevented that. Don’t let this bother you. Ensure that he fulfils your and her rights and do not harbour ill feelings against him or her. Do not discuss your negative feelings with your sons. Encourage them to accept the decision of their father. By you encouraging them and speaking well of their father and his decision to remarry, gradually you will also become at ease.
May Allah Ta'aala make it easy for you and the children, grant you contentment, peace of mind and tranquillity. Aameen.

Moulana Yusuf Laher
Checked and approved by: Mufti Siraj Desai